How Yoga and Self-Compassion
Transformed My Life

Embracing the Present Moment and Rediscovering Inner Peace on the Journey of Self-Healing - By Nicola Garcia

Reading time: 3 minutes

Yoga has been my lifeline, therapist, and savior—a constant source of healing and resetting. It became even more than that in 2010, during one of the most devastating moments of my life. At 32 weeks pregnant, I was told my baby girl, Sophia, had no heartbeat. She would not take a breath. My husband and I were crushed, and I found myself in the deep, unshakable grip of grief for months.

During those painful months, a counselor suggested I return to my yoga practice and try meditation to ease the heartache. Yoga gradually became my way of reconnecting, not only to the world around me but to myself. I found solace on the mat, and in the stillness of meditation, I began to ask questions that I had previously avoided: What happens when the future is no longer something you can plan? How do you live in the present moment when it feels unbearable?

I had always lived with the idea that happiness was just around the corner: “I’ll be happy when…”—when Sophia was born, when she would sleep through the night, when I had two kids. Yet, I missed so many of the precious moments with her while she was still in my belly, too busy planning for a future I never got to have with her.

The loss of Sophia left me carrying not only grief but also a deep-seated sense of self-hatred. I couldn’t shake the feeling that my imperfections were somehow to blame for not being able to give her life. For over a decade, that self-blame weighed on me, despite the many healing practices I tried.

I had completed my yoga teacher training, become a Reiki Master, and a hypnotherapist. I had undergone countless therapies, all in search of healing. But the true shift in my life came when I learned to cultivate self-compassion. That was the missing piece—the only way I could fully accept myself and all my perceived flaws was through yoga, which had gently guided me to this realization.

Yoga, coupled with my spiritual journey, taught me to be intentional about the life I wanted to live. It reminded me to constantly reevaluate my values and desires. I realized how easily we get caught up in external expectations—chasing materialism over minimalism, keeping up with societal norms rather than living authentically.

I believe that to truly embody self-love, we need three key things:

Self-Care: This involves the basics—nourishing the body with proper nutrition, hydration, movement, and healing practices like bodywork. It’s about honoring our physical vessel.
Self-Autonomy: This means taking full responsibility for our actions, our choices, and our feelings. It’s the independence of knowing we have control over our own lives and the responsibility to heal our emotional triggers.
Self-Compassion: This is where the true transformation happens. It means becoming our own best friend, learning to forgive ourselves for mistakes, letting go of guilt and shame, and accepting our flaws with kindness.

But how do we cultivate self-compassion in a world that often pushes us toward self-criticism?

Practicing Self-Compassion

The first step is understanding that we are not alone in our struggles. We are all part of the human experience. Just as you might feel sadness, jealousy, or anger, so do others. When you make mistakes or feel isolated, know that others have been there too. This common humanity is a comforting reminder that your emotions and experiences are shared.

Next, realize that feelings are temporary. They come and go, like waves. Instead of getting swept away by them, we can learn to soothe ourselves in the process.

This leads to the third and most powerful step: self-soothing practices. These are gentle, physical reminders of our capacity to care for ourselves. Try placing your hands on your heart or belly, offering yourself a self-hug, or rubbing your arms as a form of comfort. Speak to yourself kindly, just as you would to a dear friend, and make a conscious effort to become your biggest cheerleader rather than your harshest critic.

When we practice self-compassion, life becomes sweeter. We start to soften, not only towards ourselves but toward others as well. The world becomes kinder as we become kinder.

My daughter Sophia, who had no future and no past, became my greatest teacher of being present. Her short life gave me the most profound gift—the gift of the present moment. Through yoga and the journey of self-compassion, I have learned that healing is not about erasing our pain, but about holding it with tenderness, and learning to love ourselves through it.

This path of yoga, self-compassion, and intentional living has allowed me to embrace life fully and authentically. May we all find that same peace and presence on our journey.