How to Balance the Heart Chakra

The heart chakra corresponds to the physical heart in the body, located in the chest, the "heart space". It is naturally associated with love—unconditional love, care, empathy, compassion, and gratitude—and begins with the self: self-care, self-love, and self-compassion.

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When it came to writing this series of eight articles about healing and balancing the chakra system, this one has been by far the most difficult for me to write. It may also be the most difficult to read. Because now, we are talking about emotions. For those of us who keep our emotions very close to the surface, but just about manage to keep a lid on them, exploring the heart chakra can be triggering, leading to an effect almost like a dam bursting. It may feel safer to keep that leak plugged! For some of us, our emotions are buried so deep to avoid pain that we simply don’t want to talk about them at all. We don’t want to do that excavation. So, avoiding the heart chakra might seem like the safest thing to do.

Remember, our brains are designed to keep us safe and alive, and they will support any mindset that helps us avoid pain. Both scenarios are extreme opposites, yet two sides of the same coin. They can even be experienced simultaneously—such are the dualities and complexities of the human experience. Both situations need to be addressed in order to maintain a happy, healthy, energetic heart.

Start with an Attitude of Gratitude

On difficult days, in a world where complaining has become the norm, it may feel expected of you to moan and grumble. Recently, my car broke down just as I was almost home from a trip with my mother. As stressful as it was for the car to suddenly cut out on a busy road, I was, and am, so grateful it didn’t happen on the motorway. I wasn’t in the fast lane, driving in the dark. The car turned out to be unfixable, and not having a car temporarily created a whole set of logistical problems and headaches. But still, I was grateful no one was hurt. And the universe had given me a sign that it was time for an upgrade. Perspective and gratitude!

There are countless gratitude products on the market, from journals to cards and gratitude audios on meditation apps. But a gratitude practice can be as simple as listing aloud three things you’re grateful for right now. In fact, pause your reading and do it now! It will raise your vibration.

Allow Yourself to Feel

There’s no two ways about it—the emotions I mentioned need to be seen, felt, and processed, no matter how long they’ve been held in the body. Allow yourself to feel whatever emotion arises. Before you can process them and transmute them, you first need to feel them. Long-held grief, heartbreak, pain—old or new—feel it, and release it. Cry.

Feel Your Feelings

When our dog Kyia passed away, not long after we had lost our other dog Julia, the pain and grief were so immense that I experienced chest pains. I had physical tightening and stabbing pains in my chest. For weeks and months after her death, whenever I thought about Kyia or looked at photos, I would feel this same stabbing pain. I cried regularly. Had I not already been on this holistic journey, I surely would have gone to the doctor, citing chest pain. I know people who have visited the emergency room with similar symptoms, but no physical cause was ever found. It is literally the pain of your heart breaking.

Burying our feelings deeply can lead to longer, more serious issues. The only way out is through.

Try Cacao

Cacao—literally unprocessed chocolate—has been used in Central and South America centuries in ceremony. Despite all the challenges these cultures faced in keeping these traditions alive, we are fortunate to have the opportunity to use plant medicine today. Use cacao to open the heart, either as a beverage or in ceremony. It works literally, by increasing blood flow (so there are some contraindications you should research if you have high blood pressure, are on certain antidepressants, or are pregnant), to open the heart and its energetic pathways, enhancing feelings of empathy and love.

Create your cacao drink with plant milk (not dairy), setting your intention as you make it. Drink it mindfully, connecting with the spirit of the medicine, Mama Cacao, and remain open to its balancing effects.

Suffering is Optional

Practice healthy detachment. A heart chakra that’s too open can be as painful and unhealthy as one that is blocked. The idea that attachment leads to suffering is a central theme in yoga philosophy and is explained very well by Yoda in the Star Wars movies. So now you have an excuse to make yourself some cacao and watch a classic movie.

Remember, pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.