Finding my Purpose

Living with a traumatic brain injury (TBI) presents significant challenges. The brain, being an intricate organ, often renders the consequences of such injuries ‘invisible’ to others. Surviving a TBI can be exhausting and life-altering. Before my injury, I possessed a clear understanding of my identity and lifestyle. However, following the incident, I underwent what felt like a rebirth into an unfamiliar self – one that left me grappling with mixed feelings of acceptance and resentment.

Four years ago, my life took an unexpected turn. Alongside navigating the complexities of a severe injury, I was also confronted with persistent internal trauma that exacerbated my struggles. It was during a fun evening out with my daughters that everything changed. We decided to indulge in one of our seasonal traditions: visiting our favourite dairy bar for ice cream on a warm summer night.

As we sat together at the picnic table, it was hard to ignore the strong winds that scattered our belongings. In what felt like a peaceful moment, everything changed in an instant. While I focused on securing the plates against the swirling gusts, I suddenly felt a sharp pain at the back of my head. The next thing I knew, I found myself lying on the ground, surrounded by blood and taking in a scene of sheer chaos unfolding above me.

I was admitted to the Emergency Room, where I received treatment before being discharged. After consulting with multiple healthcare professionals, I was diagnosed with post-concussion syndrome and a TBI. This marked the beginning of my journey toward healing, self-discovery and spiritual awakening. Initially, I experienced a range of emotions including anger and sadness, which led me to resist confronting my situation. In an attempt to return to my pre-injury life, I relied on various prescribed medications. During this time, I found myself withdrawing from social interactions and attempting to disassociate from my circumstances.

After enduring a two-year struggle, my healthcare provider ultimately advised me to take a leave of absence from work. This recommendation was aimed at allowing me the time and space to focus on my healing before the situation escalated further. This period proved to be challenging as I confronted a pivotal question: How do I embrace vulnerability in my circumstances? Many individuals face this dilemma; is vulnerability a sign of weakness or an expression of strength?

I decided to face my situation directly, allowing myself to be vulnerable and honest. In doing so, I found that this openness has become one of my greatest strengths. Embracing self-acceptance marked the beginning of genuine healing.

When I stepped back from work, I took this unexpected pause as a chance to follow a dream I've held for quite some time: becoming a certified yoga instructor.

Before my injury, I found immense joy in exercising and practicing yoga. However, the decision to become a certified instructor opened up an entirely new chapter for me. I immersed myself in the philosophy of yoga and dedicated time to discovering what truly resonated with my heart. Each day, I engaged deeply with my practice – not just through the physical poses but by being fully present in my body.

I embraced all the emotions that surfaced during this journey, allowing myself to sit quietly with them. It became essential for me to ask reflective questions: Is this emotion genuinely mine, or is it masking something deeper? During each pose, I learned to simply exist, attuning myself to my body’s sensations in the stretches and movements, alongside my inner experience.